What's with all these plane crashes?

I mean seriously, what is the deal? I thought the whole idea behind airplanes was for them to stay in the air, am I right people? When I get on a plane, I just want to sit down for a few hours and get to my destination...ALIVE! Is that just me? Am I alone in this? And what is with the little bag of peanuts they give you? It's so small, it wouldn't even feed someone who's really little, are you with me on this? Also, what's with the movies on these flights? Could the movies be any lamer? And the headsets, don't even get me started on those! Any what's with all these plane crashes in crazy places? Seriously, who knew places like this even existed? Cracas? Venezuela? Martinique? These places all sound like made-up-jibber-jab to me! Give me a good old plane crash in America or Canada or even Alaska, those are places that I know something about.

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