3/29/2005
eBay A-holes
So, I'm in this war with Simon on eBay. What started out as a strategic battle for feedback rating supremecy has ultimately become a contest of special olympic proportions. At present, it is Simon, with his oversized mongoloidinal proportioned noggin, standing atop Mt Oglimpus with a feedback ranking of 80. I, with a lowly score of 69, have had to make some minor adjustments to my orthopedic footwear and rethink my battle plan.
Recently, Simon took the fight over the boundaries of decency and fair play by placing my dignity for sale on eBay. Now, this is publicity for me, which I am quite happy to exploit, but what really burns my ass more than a three foot flame is that my parents wound up winning the auction for a little over $7. All of a sudden I am feeling like I'm in a gay porno as I am surrounded by nothing but dicks and assholes.
The ultimate insult is that my parents will most likely add another distance in the ever-widening feedback gap. Son of a bitch!
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3 comments:
I might like to add that I am merely finishing a battle my good friend began.
You think a guy with an 80 rating talks to someone still in the 60's? COME ON!!!!!
I began? How can you say that! You are the one who started this by being from another country, you git! Your attacks on my eBay rating is just another example of double reverse racism against America. Go home you, (insert whatever ethnic/lineage/country) bastard!
PS: You still coming over on Thursday? Love, Neal
i hope you all burn in hell you Jew loving bastards. You and your money hungry ebay whore.
-Jakob Hirschfeld
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