E3 - On the way to see Heff

Sitting in a taxi on the way to the Playboy Mansion for what will, undoubtably, be one of the oddest amalgamations known to the species of man: Playboy Bunnies and Video Gamers. Just thinking about it makes my mouth taste like bile. In the taxi with my driver, Karen M Tuniyants, I have been brought to the point of death now two times. I'm looking at my phone when, all of a sudden, my body lunges violently forward into the plexiglass partiton. God damn that hurts when your glasses hit first. These results are still better than if I were the one driving. With the LA traffic, I would be crying and driving from a fetal position in no time. Still driving 10 minutes later. I have no idea if this guy is just taking me on a joyride or he plans on taking me back to some shady alley to beat the living shit outta me. Sometimes, it can be tough being a white suburbanite in the Big Dirty (LA). Now that IS strange: all of the street names have changed from English to Korean. I haven't seen a white person, car, or unskinned rabbit (I hope that's rabbit) in miles. The sun is setting and I am a long way from where I started. I really shouldn't have put this blindfold on. I want my blankey here to keep me safe. Still driving and my thumb has been sucked raw. All I wanted was to see the Playboy Mansion before I died. Now, I can see it, my last vision will be of the back of Mr Tuniyants greasy head. I am so scared right now. I just glanced at the fare: $971.40. I hope this trip is over soon as I only have $1000 in my pocket. Criminey, this is terrible. If I live, I'll report back tomorrow from the floor.